


Chaos Stratagems

by Witchtomez



Series: Mysme Halloweek 2018 [6]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Mysmehalloweek 2018, Mythical Creature, dokkaebi - Freeform, prompt: supernatural
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-08-28 10:59:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16722057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Witchtomez/pseuds/Witchtomez
Summary: Superstitions and old fishwives’ tales weren’t something Vanderwood bothered with; reality was ridiculous enough as is.Nonetheless, as he squatted next to the dokkaebi and downed his drink, he rationed that this situation was entirely his fault.If only he’d trashed that damn broom properly.





	Chaos Stratagems

**Author's Note:**

> The Dokkaebi is a creature of Korean myth, described to be something of a trickster goblin with an appearance close to that of the Japanese Oni. They come in several variations which can be read about [here](https://kristinelunadigitaldesignsp17.wordpress.com/2017/02/02/korean-myths-dokkaebi-%EB%8F%84%EA%B9%A8%EB%B9%84/) . For the sake of the story, I’ve decided to go with a cham dokkaebi. :)

Superstitions and old fishwives’ tales weren’t something Vanderwood bothered with; reality was ridiculous enough as is.

Nonetheless, as he squatted next to the dokkaebi and downed his drink, he rationed that this situation was entirely his fault.

_If only he’d trashed that damn broom properly._

The mistake in question was Vanderwood trusting Saeyoung to assist with a cleaning task. No matter how minimal the request, he was **_exceptionally_** reliable when it came to _screwing it up_ ; after years of sweeping up the greasy, smelly crumbs that found their way into every single room in the house, the bristles had become so laden with oil that they stuck out at odd angles and merely collected more filth with each use.

So naturally, rather than discard the worn household item as requested, the red-headed hindrance fashioned it into some bizarre lawn decor that he hid around the side of his bunker for use in a later prank.

And like many plans made before, the prank was forgotten within a week.

Meanwhile, as time went on and the scent of honey continued to ripen in the heat of the sun, it became rather enticing to wanderers once dusk settled into the sky.

So one day, when Vanderwood stormed out of the bunker and returned that night with a four pack of spirits and a fresh pack of smokes, he was halted by what looked to be a sort of horned goblin creature.

“Any of those for me?” It asked in a gravelly tone despite the unusually higher pitch.

There was a solid 30 seconds of astonished silence before Vanderwood simply opened a bottle and handed it over wordlessly, choosing to make use of his cigarettes immediately.

The goblin, absolutely delighted at its’ good fortune of happening upon a generous human, took a liberal swig of the soju and grinned toothily.

“You uh…,’ the former agent took a second to clear his throat, ’–-you been around here long?”

“About a week now, just feeling this place out. Got any food in those bags?”

Raking his eyes over the creature, Vanderwood noted the straw-like hair and the salty-sweet scent that hovered around it before smacking his palm to his forehead.

“Sorry, no-–food’s inside-–?”

Seeing the creature produce a club from seemingly nowhere, Vanderwood broke off and had to mentally remind himself that he hadn’t had a drop of liquor yet and thus _this was really happening_.

“Ooh, what kind? Tell me!” the creature insisted. Pulling out his cell phone with a sigh, the agent produced an image of the infamous chip bags that no doubt littered the bunker at this very moment.

“This doesn’t look like food…” the dokkaebi mused, tilting its head until one of its little horns almost got caught in Vanderwood’s hair.

“Heh, you’re telling me. The food is inside the bag, it’s a potato snack-–”

“Ooh! Potatoes-–that sounds like food–-” and with a wave of the club, they were now surrounded by a small wall of Honey Buddha Chips until the goblin began to tear into the bags with gusto.

Watching him devour bag after bag in record time, Vanderwood noticed that at the very least when one bag was emptied, it disappeared; though by magical instinct or the creature’s will he was unsure.

Nonetheless, it was a being that seemed to respect its surroundings enough not to trash them and that was enough to appeal to the older man. Opening a second bottle of soju, Vanderwood set it next to the hungry imp.

“I gotta head inside-–you staying around here?” Pausing, the dokkaebi turned to him with a grin.

“Hmm…I might! The energy here seems interesting, and the food is good!”

Vanderwood snorted, but smiled; the creature hadn’t particularly troubled him, and should Saeyoung come across it, it might serve as a bit of karma for the bespectacled red-head to deal with a mischievous magical entity.

“Well, enjoy yourself.” With that, Vanderwood turned the corner with a wave that the goblin cheerfully returned and heaved a sigh before preparing to enter the house.

Except he’d only banged his fist on the door once before the door was unlocked.

Saeyoung rarely ever made things so easy; Vanderwood set down his alcohol and pulled out his taser, turning on the switch before stepping past the threshold.

The debris of scattered laundry and trash was hardly out of place, so the former agent kept his steps silent as he padded around each room until he finally found his partner rifling through the kitchen.

“Luciel, what the hell!?”

Ignoring him, Saeyoung continued to rip open shelves and cabinets frantically, nearly whimpering at each empty space that greeted him.

“It’s all gone! _I’m out_? How am I out?”

A tiny shiver pricked at Vanderwood’s brain; a childhood memory surfacing in his grandmother’s voice from so many years ago:

’ _The dokkaebi gamtu is an amazing item that grants the wearer invisibility, but the dokkaebi bangmangi is the one thieves always sought because it can summon just about anything you can think of–- **so long as it exists already. ’**_

It took all the training and discipline he’d honed up to this point in his life to not crack a smile–but he needed to leave quickly.

“Quit your whining and just order some more!” In his usual dramatic fashion, the hacker dropped to all fours and groaned.

“Delivery isn’t until next week...I’m not going to make it, Madam!” Saeyoung flailed before flopping to his side. Normally, Vanderwood would have snapped at the obnoxious use of the wrong pronoun, but the current predicament was too entertaining.

“Oh no. You’ll have to consume real food for once. God forbid you absorb some actual nutrients!”

“Ah…I wonder…can I make an IV with PhD Pepper…? Mm…but needles are owie…”

.

.

.

Vanderwood left the room biting back laughter, pulling up and saving an image of the soft drink for later. He’d never paid much attention to mythology and folklore before, but he’d be a damned fool to not learn how to gain such an effective ally.


End file.
